Radio Sandwell Lifestyle News

What to hide when your new partner comes over

2013-01-11 04:58:00

If you've embarked on a new relationship and it's the first time you've invited your new partner around - don't leave these things lying around...


Dirty dishes
You and your housemates might be having a stand-off about the washing up but, if you've got a love interest coming over, it's time to be the bigger man and don those Marigolds. She doesn't want to see congealed curry or that stew pot which has been left to 'soak' since Sunday.

Toilet reading
A well-chosen toilet book is one thing, but a whole back catalogue of Nuts magazine or a newspaper left open on the bathroom floor will conjure up images so grim and graphic that any sex appeal you once had will go completely down the pan.

Bad smells
Similarly, take a few minutes to hide any noxious aromas from your place. Light a candle or even just a match to eliminate anything nasty in the bathroom, replace your threadbare bath towel which smells of damp with a clean one, and make sure you take out the rubbish and put in new bin liners.

Grooming products
She'd like to think you're effortlessly gorgeous so, while a bottle of aftershave or tub of hair wax is pretty attractive, it's best to tidy away the spot cream, hair straighteners and that rim of stubble shavings around the sink.

'Lad' apparatus
You can't do a complete Changing Rooms on your place, but you can banish anything too blokey before her visit. Put those luminous shot glasses you got in Faliraki towards the back of the cabinet, hide that topless calendar, and put anything to do with Jeremy Clarkson through the shredder.


Take a good look at your framed photos and ration accordingly. He doesn't want to see you draped over your hunky male friends or cuddled up with an ex-boyfriend, no matter how well-composed the photo is. Too many pics of babies or animals might worry him, as would a photo of your stern-looking parents.

Fake tan
If he wanted to date a tangerine dream he'd be hanging out at The Only Way Is Essex cast party, so best hide the half-empty bottle and orange-stained mit 'til after he's gone. While you're at it, hide any hair removal strips, constipation pills or Canesten.

Cuddly toys
Men might come and go but your faithful Care Bear has been there for you through thick and thin. This is no reason, however, to totally freak out your new man.  Put teddies, dolls, childhood blankets or any other inanimate object which you've given a Christian name, in the box under your bed and think twice about bringing it out again, ever.

Self-help books
Even if you take them with a pinch of salt, books with titles such as 'Understanding co-dependency' or 'How crystals can save your love life' will make him wonder what kind of headcase he has on his hands. Leave them out at your peril.

Diet food
Some men like to be healthy too but, in general, they'd take meat over a salad and bread over couscous. If he opens your fridge to find only macro-biotic meals and rice milk he might have nightmare visions of enforced detoxing and junk food guilt-trips.


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