According to research men lie an average of three times a day. Here are some of their most common porky pies...
"Sorry, I missed your call/my battery died/I had no signal."
Actually ladies, he/it didn't. He was screening. This could be because he feels you're being too needy, is thinking of splitting up or just because he fancies a bit of "me-time" occasionally. Don't hold it against him.
"I'm on my way."
He usually uses this one as a way to curtail situations or gatherings that he'd rather not be at. He never really wanted to go to your grandparents anniversary dinner, but he knew he couldn't bail completely without you getting upset, so turns up late to lessen the ordeal. Yes, it's a bit lame, but it makes him feel like he's in control so let it slide for now.
"No, your bum does not look big in that."
Give the guy a break. He knows there is only one answer to the question "Does my bum look big in this?" and the truth doesn't even come into it. If you're feeling insecure about your figure it's his job to make you feel better about it no matter what he really thinks. You should be grateful he cares enough to bolster your confidence.
"Let's talk about it later"
You've got to admire him for this one. It's a clever way of placating you and averting a possible argument. Of course, he has no intention of bringing the subject up again if he can help it. That would involve talking about feelings and emotions and stuff! Dream on.
"I love your family/friends."
He's smart and knows just how much importance you place on your friends and family. They're important to you so he wants you to think they're important to him too. He probably doesn't enjoy popping over to your mum's for dinner every week or hanging out with your best friends quite as much as he says he does. He'd rather be at home with his feet up watching the box, but he cares about you enough to do it, so you've nothing to complain about.
"I wasn't looking at her."
No matter how gorgeous you are, there isn't a man alive who has eyes for just one woman. Don't waste your energy getting upset because he always perks up when the girl from that sun tan advert pops up on TV. He might find her attractive, but it's you he's with and as long as he's not acting on those impulses there's really no harm in it.
Now here are two little words he uses liberally as all-purpose tool to get him off the hook and avert an argument. Once he's apologised for whatever it is he's supposedly done and promised to make amends, there's not much you can come back at him with, even if you suspect it's not really a heart felt apology. It's quite clever really.
"It wasn't that expensive and I bought it for us, not just me."
Boys like their gadgets. If he's succumb to shelling out for the latest 3D TV when he knows you're supposed to be saving up for a holiday, so he needs to make it sound like it was a truly un-missable deal as well as point out how useful it will be for you too. Don't be fooled. He bought it for himself and you'll be lucky if you ever get a chance to be in charge of the remote.